So I finally had the courage to call my father and talk about the things that really needed to be talked about aka, my homosexuality. It started off fine just trying to apologize that I haven’t called in almost a year and once it got to the point of having me finally spill this unspoken issue after 3 years it just exploded into a huge emotional mess. I was trying to explain to my father that I felt pushed away because he nor his wife (My step-mom) loved me; but I guess that wasn’t the case.
We continue to talk and he has the audacity to tell me that he doesn’t approve of my homosexuality and wont ever except it but he wont try and change me because it’s my “Choice.” So I am sitting here on the phone crying because I know my father still says he loves me, but I don’t think he ever will because of my “Choice.”
That word pisses me off more than a lot of words. “Choice” Like I choose everyday to be put down by society. To be told that I am not good enough, that I don’t have the same rights because of my “Life choice” because I wanted to be discriminated against and bullied all my life. I didn’t chose to be gay I was just born gay and I am sorry if you can’t accept that your only son is gay you might not be in my life for that much longer. I can’t stand when people think it’s a choice because why would we want to go through all the shit we do if it is a choice.